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Buy now. Please also read our Privacy Notice and Terms of Usewhich became effective December 20, I want to clear up a question about a certain Eskimo social custom.

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The question is whether Eskimos loan their wives to strangers. I have heard this claim in various social gatherings as an example of how we might resolve jealousy issues, but I am skeptical and wonder whether this is an urban legend or has specific contextual constraints.

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I notice you use the present tense "loan. Sorry to disappoint, but the Eskimos have gone and let Christianity ruin a beautiful thing.

Besides which, it never really worked quite the way a certain sixteen-year-old used to imagine. But did they offer that privilege to any horny schmuck who showed up on the front stoop?

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Generally not. The lending of wives to perfect strangers happened occasionally in some places, but it was never the widespread custom it has been made out to be. There were several contexts in which a husband would let another man sleep with his wife.

The most widespread was ritual spouse exchange, practiced in one form or another in every region where Eskimos lived, from eastern Greenland to the Bering Sea. This sort of spouse exchange was always associated with a religious purpose, and was always done at the instigation of an angekok shaman.

Often the point was to effect some desired outcome, such as better weather or hunting conditions.

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The best known example of ritual spouse exchange was the "putting-out-of-the-lamps game" played in Greenland. This was a sort of combination of seven minutes in heaven, Roman orgy, and prayer meeting. The prayer-meeting ct failed to overcome the objections of the early Christian missionaries, one of whom called it the "whore game.

To play at home: gather together a number of married couples according to some sources, singles could play too ; wait for the angekok to contact the spirits; turn out the lights; screw a random member of the opposite sex; turn on the lights.

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The idea seemed to be that the spirits would be more willing to cooperate if you did it that way. Who are we to disappoint the spirits?

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This game was played only in Greenland, but other spouse-exchange rituals were practiced elsewhere. One example from Alaska was called the "bladder feast," which sounds a bit less appetizing.

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This was reciprocal spouse exchange, sometimes described as co-marriage. It was found in all or almost all areas inhabited by the Eskimos, although it was rare in some regions.

Even in areas where it was common, many couples did not participate.

are mistaken

Co-marriage was not entered into lightly since it usually resulted in lifelong bonds amongst all members of both families. Besides the obvious motive of sex with a new partner, the purpose was to strengthen economic and friendship bonds between the two families, who could depend on each other in times of need.

Generally each married couple maintained its own household. The practice is often called "wife exchange," but more logically it should be "husband exchange" since it was almost always the husbands who changed places.

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The exchange might last any length of time, with a week or so being typical. The husbands would then move back to their own houses until the exchange was repeated, which might be in a few months, or maybe never.

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The family-type bonds remained in force even in cases where the actual exchange was made only once. Participating couples might have such arrangements with one other couple or with several.

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The popular conception is that it was a matter of common hospitality to offer this service to any man traveling without his own wife.

This is certainly not an accurate interpretation.

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As far as I can tell, no Eskimo male was ever expected to offer his wife to a visitor, and nowhere did it happen as a matter of course. Husbands did occasionally volunteer to lend their wives to visitors, but there seems to have been a general aversion to doing so. If, on the other hand, a guest brashly asked to borrow the wife, the rules of hospitality might make it hard to refuse.

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It would usually be considered rude to make the request, however. If the host had more than one wife roughly one in ten di he might be more willing to offer one of them to a guest, but that was still not the universal custom. Sometimes an unmarried woman, usually a widow, would be offered or would offer herself to the traveler.

Unmarried people of both sexes had considerable sexual freedom, and nobody thought less of them for exercising that freedom. Girls tended to marry as soon as they reached sexual maturity, and widows and divorced women usually remarried quickly.

The common Western misconception of widespread wife-lending to unfamiliar travelers may have several roots.

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The practice was apparently more common among the Aleuts than Eskimos, and these two groups have often been lumped together.

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